The Sports Bra Workout

     Exercise has been a considerable part of my life for many years.  I have done Jazzercise, step aerobics, Tae Bo, cardio kick boxing, spinning, circuit training, and of course Richard Simmons’” Sweatin to the Oldies”.  I have belonged to various health clubs and used free weights as well as the Nautalis machines.   Walking, running, cycling, tennis, water aerobics and kayaking – I have benefited from them all.  Yes, working out has taken up a big part of my life but still I struggled to find the ideal all around exercise program that promotes faster weight loss – until recently.   After all of these wasted years I have finally found the key to a successful exercise and weight loss plan – a sports bra.  Yes, that’s right, I said a sports bra.  Not just any style, but specifically the spandex-cotton blend that must be pulled over your head, no fasteners.

            This year I resolved to really focus on losing the weight, build Terminator type muscle definition, flexibility and reach optimum health.  I committed to going to the gym 5-6 days each week to reach this aspiration.  Things were going well in the beginning.   I was very motivated and felt the results of my endless hours in the gym.  I went from walking on the treadmill to running; hence the need of a sports bra. This is when my new weight loss and exercise plan was born.  Running in an ordinary, run-of-the-mill bra does not work.  The straps fall off the shoulders, the elastic stretches out, and the support just is not there.  Now at my age, things in that department have shifted and gravity has taken over.  I definitely need the support even with my petite B cup size.  So I did what every woman does – I went shopping and purchased my first sports bra. 

            Due to my work schedule, I need to go to the gym in the evening after working all day, making dinner, and all of the other chores necessary as a mom.  The routine is the same each day.  I rush the kids through dinner; help my son find his missing shoe, and then off to change into my work out attire, praying along the way for more energy.  I am already exhausted and perspiring.  I get my new sports bra, rip off the tags and pull it on over my head.  It gets twisted in the back and I can’t reach it.  I stretch my right arm behind me and try to reach the twisted portion.  It is just out of my reach.  I try with my left arm.  Same problem.  I take a deep breath and by the second attempt my flexibility somehow must have improved and I am able to reach a small piece of fabric.  Due to the perspiration, it is really stuck.  I use all of my strength and yank it down a little.  As I wiggle around, the bra slowly becomes untwisted and I can reach it and smooth it out.  I look in the mirror and see that my face is flushed and sweat beads have formed on my forehead.  I finish getting dressed and am now way too tired to go to the gym.  Instead, I dish myself some ice cream and recover from the work out.

            The next day, same routine, same sports bra, same problem.  This time though, my arms are extremely sore from the twisted sports bra experience from the evening before.  I have to humbly ask my daughter’s help for the next few days.  It is humiliating to ask your pre-teen child to be careful to strategically stuff the back fat under the material.

            On the 4^th day of being a sports bra owner, it is far past the time to launder this undergarment.  Fear of shrinkage kept me from washing it sooner, but now the white bra is turning a slight tinge of yellow.  The tag says to line dry, but time was of the essence.  It was not completely dry, so I put it on while it was slightly damp.  Not a good idea.  I worked for 30 minutes trying to get it on without degrading myself again by asking for assistance.  As I lay down on the bed, stomach down, back arched, I reached behind me in an extremely unnatural position and pulled a muscle in my neck, unable to move.  I had to humble myself once again and call for my daughter’s aid.  I didn’t make it to the gym, but thankfully my massage therapist is open late.  She recommended that I not use that piece of exercise equipment for at least three days.   I went home and had another bowl of ice cream.

            Well, after recovering from my injuries, I proceeded to get ready for the gym once again.  To my wonder and amazement, the bra went on much easier.  My flexibility improved immensely as well as my strength.  I got on the scale and was thrilled to see that I had lost 5 lbs since the purchase of my sports bra.  I realized that in order to continue the process of weight loss, it was necessary to buy a few more, maybe in different colors and smaller sizes.

            This is how I lost 20 lbs.  I am now in the process of writing an exercise program for sports bra proprietors.  I have found that it is the best way to get a cardio workout without even setting foot in the gym.  Flexibility in your arms, back and shoulders will improve dramatically as well as upper body strength.    This book will be recommended for women only and it is vital that you have a good massage thereapist while breaking in your new bra.  Please take heed, consuming large quantities of ice cream while on this program will slow the weight loss process, but is highly recommended as the calcium builds strong bones!